SNL Retro: Art Garfunkel/Stephen Bishop (3/11/78)

by Brendan Wahl

(Season 3, Episode 13)

Paul Simon was on the show frequently, but this is Artie’s first and only time as a host. He has also never appeared as a musical guest. To be fair though, Simon ended up a lot more popular than ol’ Big-Hair.

The Show:

“Jacques Cousteau Gets an Undersea Enema” will not be seen tonight. Darn…

1. Modern Crimes (1:51)

In a spoof on the recent events involving the theft of Charlie Chaplin’s body, two men (Aykroyd & Belushi) attempt to steal the body of the Tramp himself (Radner) while trying to not be thwarted by a police officer (Murray) on patrol.

- I had to look up the news item in question because I had no idea this actually happened, but let me tell you my friends, it was well worth it.
- Doing the entire thing as a silent movie parody was obvious and brilliant at the same time. I especially loved Belushi clearly mouthing “let’s get the fuck out of here,” but the caption leaves out the profanity.
- Murray is also great as the cop, swirling his baton around in a hilariously over-the-top way.
- The LFNY part was pretty clever too.
- The camera lingered on the sketch a BIT long, it seemed. After Radner opened the show, you could see Danny and John start to smile and begin to walk away.
**** 1/2

2. Monologue (4:44)

Art comes out to sing “Wonderful World” with Stephen Bishop (the Sam Cooke one; not the Louis Armstrong one), but falls victim to the faulty microphones and sound system. John Belushi comes out to defend him and rag on the network for mistreating the show, but his rant soon turns towards Garfunkel instead when Art refuses to join in on the NBC-bashing.

- Belushi was his usual hilarious, manic, ranting self here and I’m glad he interrupted so we got a proper monologue rather than a song at the top of the show. John’s acting here was great and it proved to me that he probably could have had a real future with dramatic work, even.
- Art plays a good victim of slow burn here and he still had quite a bit of difficulty at maintaining a straight face in front of John’s theatrics.
- Best line: “There’s no reason why Garrett Morris should have to get up early and drive Jane Pauley to work every single morning.”
****

3. Art Garfunkel & Stephen Bishop sing “Wonderful World” (2:24)

- I’m making this and the monologue two separate segments because that’s what the SNL Archives did and it makes sense to me…
- This was a pretty good performance. It’s a shame that Garfunkel never really did much post-breakup.

4. Kromega III (1:43)

Repeat from Steve Martin/Jackson Browne (9/24/77).
*** 1/2

5. Tomorrow (4:29)

Tom Snyder (Aykroyd) interviews a battered husband (Garfunkel); a man who wants to be left anonymous as he sits in the dark. However, Tom has a hard time concealing the identity of the young man as he drops the man’s name by mistake and several other obvious indicators related to who the man is.

- A home-run recurring impression for Danny. He really nails Snyder’s cadence and in particular, he does a great job with the little side conversations he has with people in the crew and that damn laugh.
- Artie was actually pretty good here too, as he talks about being caught masturbating by his abusive wife and then getting increasingly frustrated by Snyder’s comments that give away his identity.
- Aykroyd’s quick description of who his guest was at the end of the sketch was pretty amusing too thanks to his rapid-fire delivery.
****

6. Stephen Bishop sings “On and On” (3:03)

- This was a hugely popular song at the time. I think pretty much anyone would recognize it as soon as it starts playing.
- Bishop is certainly a talented musician and it makes for a pretty good performance. Nothing outstanding, but it’s a nice song.
- His set was really cool, too. I miss when musicians were able to have influence on their own backdrops and stuff. Although it seems like that’s picked up a bit recently with Kanye West and Cee Lo Green this past season.
- Is he actually real good friends with Garfunkel? Anyone know? I know he would go on to do the theme song for Animal House so there’s a connection to Belushi. He’s also in the movie as the hippie who gets his guitar broken by John.

7. Miracle In Chicago (4:12)

At an Irish pub, the bartender (Aykroyd) complains about the jukebox people not including “Tura Lura Lura,” especially because it’s St. Patrick’s Day. One of the patrons, a construction worker (Murray), discusses the possibility of the deceased Mayor Daley making an appearance this year.

- This sketch meant well, but was lacking in the laughs department.
- Belushi looked funny as Daley and had a couple of amusing moments, explaining that his theory on “one vote – one turkey” has changed.
**

8. KISS Concert (4:24)

A security guard (Belushi) employs some tough measures when several people attempt to get into the backstage area at a KISS concert including a “friend of Peter Criss’,” Stephen Bishop, and many others.

- This was a funny walk-on sketch that had many funny characters from Garfunkel being the brother of Paul Stanley, who escaped the air force just to see his brother and the first appearance of Bill Murray’s smarmy agent character, Jerry Eldini.
- Belushi’s exchange with Stephen Bishop (“I hate that song!”) was a really funny exchange as well.
- Did Danny look freaky in that Paul Stanley getup or what? Yikes.
*** 1/2

9. UPDATE TEASER w/Jane Curtin (:06)

- Elizabeth Taylor being force-fed for charity.

10. WEEKEND UPDATE w/Dan Aykroyd & Jane Curtin (9:15)
Guests: Garrett Morris & Bill Murray

Best Jokes: Orson Welles; violent police force; Charlie Chaplin; Larry Flynt shooting; Bubbles the Hippo

- The sponsor bit (“Hershey Highway”) was hilarious but got barely any reaction.
- Garrett does the first commentary as “scientist, Dr. Garrett Morris” to introduce a new medical piece of business that will stop blood clots in their path. It seemed to be going nowhere at first with Garrett stumbling over many of his lines, but the Mighty Mouse footage was pretty funny and saved it. I also liked the bit at the end where Danny and Garrett talk about how glad they are that President Nixon had the affliction.
- Bill Murray’s bit is on the “Hanoi Jane” controversy, but then he segues into a review of Coming Home and praises Fonda’s political activism. Murray then declares his opposition to the Vietnam War and solemnly states that he doesn’t care what it does to his career, despite the protests being over for nearly ten years.
- Aykroyd being caught with his feet on the desk was a good capper to the entire segment.
****

11. Art Garfunkel sings “All I Know” & “Scarborough Fair” (5:44)

- Another performance from Art? Alrighty then, no complaints here. It seems a bit odd though that Bishop hasn’t been given a second performance instead.
- Artie does really well by himself and proved that he is no second banana even though history will always see him as “the partner of Paul Simon.”
- It was awesomely awesome to hear “Scarborough Fair;” one of my favourite S&G ditties.

12. Looks At Books (3:35)

Jane Curtin interviews the Nerds (Murray & Radner), who have written a book on the class of ’77. Lisa and Todd proceed to annoy Jane and make dorky remarks as per usual.

- Like I said during their first appearance, these sketches usually work because of Bill and Gilda’s performances and their chemistry together.
- Gilda’s description of different classmates was funny as was Bill’s constant goofy laughing throughout the whole sketch.
- Murray’s character is still being referred to as Todd LaBounta. I believe the character’s name would change when they did this sketch the next time.
- By their next appearance, they finally broke out of the talk-show format and would get involved in some classics. This was still pretty average though; not quite as funny as their first outing.
** 1/2

13. Schiller’s Reel: Don’t Look Back in Anger (3:51)

Sometime in the distant future, an elderly John Belushi visits the graves of his fellow Not Ready for Primetime Players and comments on how each of them died from Dan Aykroyd loving motorcycles too much to Jane Curtin dying from complications with cosmetic surgery. John solemnly states that he misses them all, but suddenly gets a joyful look in his eye when he reveals how he was able to outlive them all.

- This was hard to watch to say the least. The idea of Belushi outliving everyone else on the show is a sad, ironic twist on the same man being dead a mere four years later from this date.
- That being said, this was a classic film piece and probably the best Schiller’s Reel that was ever done.
- The jokes revolving around how each person passed away was pretty funny (although the story about Garrett was eerily close to John’s real fate), but this sketch was done more for mood and tone and that’s where it really excelled.
- John’s performance here is magnificent; this has been a really strong episode for him. The final image of him dancing is not something I’ll easily forget.
*****

14. Andy Kaufman (7:56)

Frequent special guest on SNL, Andy Kaufman, makes his eighth appearance and sports a British accent, “his true voice.” Instead of entertaining the audience with silly characters and goofy songs, he reads The Great Gatsby and keeps going on and on, despite the audience eventually getting visibly pissed off.

- Andy is brilliant. This is perhaps his finest work on the show. It’s an exercise in patience and how much you can get away with in front of a hostile New York audience.
- There is no joke here. Andy just reads the book as the audience chuckles at first at the absurdity of this piece and then some begin loudly coughing and hissing in opposition to the segment.
- Andy has the audience at his whim and command. I particularly liked him teasing them with playing a record and then it ended up being just more audio of him reading the book, but the fake-out with him leaving and then coming back was hilarious too.
- With Lorne Michaels making a quick appearance and whispering to Andy to leave, it gave this a sense of legitimacy.
*****

15. The Looking For Mr. Goodbar Sleepytime Playset (2:10)

(For anyone who is not aware, “Looking For Mr. Goodbar” is a 1977 film based on a true story about a teacher who seemingly had a double life and was always searching for scummy-type guys in bars to take home with her and have rough sex with. She was eventually stabbed, killed, and raped (in that order) when one of these guys didn’t turn out to be as friendly as the rest.)

The toy promoting senseless sex and violence is finally released! As a little girl (Radner) discovers it, the narrator describes the different aspects of this inappropriate children’s playset.

- This is definitely a Michael O’Donoghue piece. It has the dark humour that he is known for and the juxtaposition of the little girl with the dark source material. Classic stuff.
- I liked Gilda using the Teddy Bear purse to save the day (a callback to that sketch where she played a woman stricken with Gidget’s Disease?) and her performance as a little girl was perfect as always.
- This also reminded me of the Creeley’s Soup ad from Julian Bond/Tom Waits, Brick just because of Gilda being the little girl and Bill Murray’s voice as the narrator telling her what to do.
**** 1/2

16. Art Garfunkel sings “Crying in My Sleep” (3:32)

- A FOURTH song from Garfunkel and Bishop only gets two?! And on one of those, he was just back-up for Artie. Wow, good thing I like you, Mr. Garfunkel.
- This was actually my favourite performance from him of the night, actually. I really liked the very ending of the song, which was a little nod to “All I Have to Do Is Dream” by the Everly Brothers.
- Kinda weird how Art was absent on the sketch side of things after Update. In fact, he was only in two sketches all night!

17. Goodnights

- Evidently, the show was running pretty long as Garfunkel very quickly thanks everyone and only about three credits are shown. It wasn’t even 20 seconds.

OVERALL: A big step up from last week’s above-average broadcast. Artie helmed one of the top shows of the season so far with only two sketches that didn’t quite connect and what seemed like classic-after-classic in terms of the other material. Garfunkel himself was a fairly non-descript host; he certainly wasn’t bad, but he only appeared in two sketches (unless you count the monologue) and his other three appearances were musical performances. He never played anything more than deadpan or the straight man, but he was still adequate in his roles. His music was really good, though. Stephen Bishop was a worthy addition and sadly only got one performance, but he made the most out of that and his cameo in the KISS Concert sketch. The real star of this episode though is John Belushi. The man owned this one and delivered some truly great performances. Danny and Billy are close contenders, but this was Belushi’s home run.

BREAKDOWN: (because of the fact that Artie did a lot of music, I will include it. I don’t normally though, nor will I for Stephen Bishop)

HOST: ART GARFUNKEL – 6 segments (Monologue; “Wonderful World;” Tomorrow; KISS Concert; “All I Know” & “Scarborough Fair;” “Crying in My Sleep”)
MUSICAL GUEST: STEPHEN BISHOP – 2 segments (Monologue; KISS Concert)

CAST:

DAN AYKROYD – 5 segments (Modern Crimes; Tomorrow; Miracle In Chicago; KISS Concert; Weekend Update)
JOHN BELUSHI – 5 segments (Modern Crimes; Monologue; Miracle In Chicago; KISS Concert; Schiller’s Reel)
JANE CURTIN – 3 segments (KISS Concert; Weekend Update; Looks At Books)
GARRETT MORRIS – 2 segments (KISS Concert; Weekend Update)
BILL MURRAY – 5 segments (Modern Crimes; Miracle In Chicago; KISS Concert; Weekend Update; Looks At Books)
LARAINE NEWMAN – 1 segment (KISS Concert)
GILDA RADNER – 3 segments (Modern Crimes; Looks At Books; The Looking For Mr. Goodbar Sleepytime Playset)

FEATURED PLAYERS:

TOM DAVIS – 1 segment (KISS Concert)
AL FRANKEN – none

EPISODE MVP: John Belushi

SNL Retro: O.J. Simpson/Ashford & Simpson (2/25/78)

by Brendan Wahl

(Season 3, Episode 12)

Well, this will be an interesting one to review. O.J. obviously had a much different reputation in 1978 than he does now. Back then, Simpson was a respected Heisman Trophy-winning football player instead of today where he is… well, I won’t bother going into it. It’s pretty obvious.

Anyway…

The Show:

“James At 16 Marries Roman Polanski” will not be seen tonight…

1. Audience Questions (2:30)

Because of the fact that the writers couldn’t think of a cold open this week, Gilda Radner stands center-stage and reads some questions that the audience wrote for her.

- This was a pretty cute and clever idea with all of the questions being obvious filler and clearly scribed by the writers of the show.
- The piece works really well due to Gilda’s cuteness and innocence along with her hilariously deadpan way of answering the questions.
- I liked how all the questions were from people named Kevin. The best part of that, though, was when “Kevin” asked Gilda to settle a bet with his wife “Kevin” that SNL always started with the words, “Give me all your hot monkey love.”
*** 1/2

2. Monologue (5:39)

O.J. comes out with Conehead gear on and explains how he got to achieve his specific goals in life like getting into pro football, winning the Heisman trophy, and eventually hosting SNL. And how he’ll murder his ex-wife in about 17 years. Okay, that last part didn’t happen.

- This was really long-winded and there was no real jokes here, but O.J. seemed really at ease. Almost like he’d just murdered someone and got away with it.
- Okay, that’s all for the O.J. jokes. I promise.
- The band accompanying O.J. with the music was mildly amusing at first, but this monologue was kind of a chore to sit through. I mean, the message was good and all but it wasn’t really a monologue fitting for an episode of SNL.
* 1/2

3. Samurai Night Fever (8:21)

In an elaborate parody of the 1977 disco mega-hit, Futaba (Belushi) deals with his family issues with his domineering father (Murray) while teaching his fallen priest brother (Simpson) how to go the disco and get down with his bad self.

- This was a great use of the Samurai character. Belushi was the anchor of this whole sketch and pulled it off with aplomb, mixing his much-loved character with some of Travolta’s quirks and nuances.
- Acting was a real strong suit for this sketch because besides Belushi, there was some great stuff from Murray as the hard-to-please father, O.J. as the willing pupil, and Jane as his proud mother just to name a few highlights.
- I’m already surprised by Simpson’s talents as a host. It doesn’t look like he glanced at the cue cards during the whole sketch and he was really comfortable the whole time. I especially liked him stopping Futaba from stabbing himself (so he could do it himself?) much like Buck did in most of the sketches with the character.
- The absolute highlight of this sketch was Belushi doing his big spotlight dance in the middle of the disco scene.
- This sketch was even popular enough for them to reference in the Gary Busey/Eubie Blake, Gregory Hines episode a year later, so this clearly stuck with a lot of people.
****

4. Great Moments In Sports (6:40)

O.J. narrates a story in which Babe Ruth (Belushi) visited a young black kid (Morris) in the hospital and promises to hit a home run for him. Due to Babe’s eating and drinking problems, though, it proves to be a tougher task than expected.

- Pretty thin premise for a sketch here and it never really felt like an idea fully realized. The ending also felt really tacked-on.
- Belushi was his usual great self here, but Garrett was utterly unconvincing as a child. I did like his reaction to the sports announcer mentioning that the kid was dying, though.
- I liked O.J.’s little moments as the narrator spliced into the actual story when he would be caught eating crackerjacks or picking his teeth, for instance. His comic timing was impeccable.
**

5. Ashford & Simpson sing “So, So Satisfied” (3:47)

- Not a bad little performance.
- Remember that awful sketch with Halle Berry where she keeps attacking Ashford (Kenan Thompson) & Simpson (Maya Rudolph) while they’re performing for her? Ugh.
- Kinda funny that someone with the last name Simpson is the host and one of the musical guests, eh?

6. Mohawk Master (1:07)

The new product uses two razors on a device that allows one to achieve the mohawk look in one smooth motion.

- Not up to par with some of Danny’s classic spokesperson bits, but this was still pretty funny.
- The sheep with the ‘hawk was a pretty funny visual and it came out of nowhere.
*** 1/2

7. The Raid on Nicosia (2:15)

Only one week after the unwanted raid by Egyptian forces on some hijackers in Nicosia, NBC has jumped on the bandwagon and already filmed the TV movie with a cadre of stars like Ed Asner (Belushi), Robert Stack (Aykroyd), and more.

- This was seemingly going to be a multi-impression sketch, but it turned out to be something different. It was still pretty amusing.
- Murray as Tony Orlando rushing his men into battle was hilarious as was Aykroyd’s terrific Robert Stack impression.
- I also really liked Valerie Harper (Radner) playing the wife of Anwar Sadat and not changing her accent whatsoever.
*** 1/2

8. Weekend Update w/ Dan Aykroyd and Jane Curtin (10:36)

Guests: O.J. Simpson, Bill Murray, Laraine Newman, & Roseanne Roseannadanna (Radner)

Best Jokes: Elizabeth Ray endorsement; Nasal frostbite

- Wow, a golden shower joke in 1978? I wonder how many people got that.
- Bill Murray gives a commentary on Woody Allen being the darling of the Oscars this year, but dismisses the comparisons to Orson Welles because he doesn’t see the petite Jewish man gaining 400 pounds and becoming a strange recluse. Billy’s piece is quick, but very funny as was his interaction with Jane at the end.
- Laraine interviews O.J. Simpson as the first woman reporter to be in an all-male locker room of a football team. O.J. makes a funny flub here where he calls Laraine by Jane’s name and plays smug in a really convincing (hmm?) way. Funny segment overall, though.
- Roseanne Roseannadanna does the final commentary, her “consumer report,” and responds to a question from “Mr. Bob Van Ry” (but still responds to him with “Mr. Feder” — oops!) regarding proper teeth care and then starts talking about finding gross stuff in one’s teeth and the different methods of getting it out. Her description of materials being used to clean out her teeth getting stuck as well was amusingly disgusting and Jane’s angry reaction to the whole commentary was hilarious like usual.
- Not very many jokes tonight, which is why there are only two highlights.
****

9. Football Voodoo (3:44)

O.J. and some of his buddies watch the game in suspense as Walter Payton attempts to break Simpson’s record. O.J. seems unbothered by this fact, but secretively sticks a voodoo doll with several pins, water, and other items to hinder his playing ability.

- This was good and seeing O.J.’s reactions as he quickly pricked the doll with needles and then threw it away effortlessly was pretty funny.
- Did Danny, John, and Garrett actually crack up and start laughing when O.J. started celebrating off-screen or was that part of the sketch? Seemed pretty realistic to me.
***

10. The Franken and Davis Show (4:50)

Tom Davis announces that Al has a malignant brain tumor, but he wants to do one more program before he passes away. Al is in a very debilitated state and only remembers the most rudimentary jokes, needing constant doses of water to remain conscious.

- This is a very funny but very, very dark piece that they probably couldn’t get away with today.
- I especially liked Davis’ exaggerated expressions while standing behind Al and his attempts to get the crowd riled up and laughing at the lame jokes.
- I’ve always really liked the ending of these where they both innocently wave at the camera and yell goodnight.
****

11. Mandingo II (1:45)

In a sequel to the controversial slave-drama, both slaves and masters are drawn to each other in an attempt to irk the censors as much as possible.

- Classic sketch where O.J., Garrett Morris, Bill Murray, and Laraine Newman get to discover the inside of each other’s mouths quite a bit.
- I loved the premise where they took the original of a black slave kissing a white girl and upped the ante by having him kiss other black slaves, the white slave master, and the white girl.
- Everyone really committed to this too and Danny’s announcer voice certainly didn’t hurt matters.
**** 1/2

12. E. Buzz Miller’s Animal Kingdom (2:40)

Buzz (Aykroyd) and Christy Christina (Newman) take a look at footage of different animals in the wild, but it boils down to showing these animals only during their mating process.

- E. Buzz Miller is a sleazeball character; one that Dan excels in. He is somewhat like Irwin Mainway, but Buzz is supposed to be more likeable.
- Christy is a funny side character and her high-pitched giggling had me rolling from laughter.
- I think my favourite part was when Christy remarked that an earthworm had herpes based on the little dots on its body.
- This was also kept pretty short, which certainly helped the one-note nature of the piece.
*** 1/2

13. Hertz (:37)

O.J. uses Hertz to get somewhere on time, but the receptionist (Newman) tells him that the keys have been given to Walter Payton, who “had a better season.”

- This was one quick joke (and pretty much the same one from the football voodoo bit), but it was okay.
- Clever use of Emily Litella here and thankfully she would only make one more appearance. I love me some Gilda Radner, but Emily wore out her welcome very quickly.
** 1/2

14. Ashford & Simpson sing “Don’t Cost You Nothing” (3:38)

- This song had a lot more energy and was more enjoyable than the first song.
- I particularly liked their goofy 70s dancing, but their voices are really good

15. Celebrity Battle of the Sexes & Races (3:28)

Phyllis George (Curtin) hosts an event in which black men O.J. Simpson and Leon Spinx (Morris) go toe-to-toe with Sandy Duncan (Newman) and Marie Osmond (Radner) in a series of challenges.

- This was a funny way to parody those ridiculous Battle of the Sexes shows that were airing on NBC around this time.
- Garrett was hilarious as Spinx with his toothless smile and his funny facial expressions.
- The recap of all the events won and lost by Brent Musburger (Murray) was very stereotypical, but very hilarious as they were mocking NBC’s willingness to do something like this, which was already pretty offensive to begin with.
*** 1/2

16. Goodnights

- O.J. seems to have gotten along with the cast awfully well

OVERALL: While it wasn’t the strongest show this season or anywhere close to it, this was still a pretty good episode and it just shows how strong of a run the show was on at this point if this is one of its weaker episodes. O.J. was a surprise; he was a pretty good host and, despite playing himself in many sketches and not really stretching much, provided many funny moments throughout the night; definitely the best murderer-host (sorry, Robert Blake and Snoop Dogg). The cast was very well-represented throughout the night for the most part as there were a number of sketches featuring the host and every castmember in them. There were a couple of clunkers, but there were also a good number of enjoyable pieces, making this an above-average broadcast.

BREAKDOWN:

HOST: O.J. SIMPSON – 9 segments (Monologue; Samurai Night Fever; Great Moments In Sports; The Raid on Nicosia; Weekend Update; Football Voodoo; Mandingo II; Hertz; Celebrity Battle of the Sexes & Races)

CAST:

DAN AYKROYD – 7 segments (Samurai Night Fever; Great Moments In Sports; Mohawk Master; The Raid on Nicosia; Weekend Update; Football Voodoo; E. Buzz Miller’s Animal Kingdom)
JOHN BELUSHI – 4 segments (Samurai Night Fever; Great Moments In Sports; The Raid on Nicosia; Football Voodoo)
JANE CURTIN – 5 segments (Samurai Night Fever; Great Moments In Sports; The Raid on Nicosia; Weekend Update; Celebrity Battle of the Sexes & Races)
GARRETT MORRIS – 4 segments (Great Moments In Sports; The Raid on Nicosia; Football Voodoo; Celebrity Battle of the Sexes & Races)
BILL MURRAY – 6 segments (Samurai Night Fever; Mohawk Master; The Raid on Nicosia; Weekend Update; Mandingo II; Celebrity Battle of the Sexes & Races)
LARAINE NEWMAN – 8 segments (Samurai Night Fever; Mohawk Master; The Raid on Nicosia; Weekend Update; Mandingo II; E. Buzz Miller’s Animal Kingdom; Hertz; Celebrity Battle of the Sexes & Races)
GILDA RADNER – 6 segments (Audience Questions; Samurai Night Fever; The Raid on Nicosia; Weekend Update; Hertz; Celebrity Battle of the Sexes & Races)

FEATURED PLAYERS:

TOM DAVIS – 1 segment (The Franken and Davis Show)
AL FRANKEN – 1 segment (The Franken and Davis Show)

EPISODE MVPs: Bill Murray/Laraine Newman

SNL Retro: Chevy Chase/Billy Joel (2/18/78)

by Brendan Wahl

(Season 3, Episode 11)

The only thing I really have to add before I type up this episode is the little debacle which took place about two minutes before the show began.

Tensions had been building up all week when Chevy returned to host and it was especially showing between Mr. Chase and his replacement, castmember Bill Murray. Eventually, it all came to a boiling point. As insults like “Medium talent!” and “Why don’t you fuck your wife every now and then?” were thrown out, the two finally came to blows and had to be pulled apart by cast, crew, and writers alike.

Thirty seconds later, Chevy had to be thrust out onstage for the show…

The Show:

“The Little House on the Prairie Burns to the Ground” will not be seen tonight..
1. A Former President Speaks To The Nation (3:53)

Former president Gerald Ford (Chase) addresses the advantages surrounding the Suez Canal and criticizes President Reagan’s points. He is consoled by wife Betty (Curtin) and also uses the assistance of a map to illustrate why the canal is important.

- Chevy looks a bit shaken from the aforementioned fight with Billy.
- As good as these Ford sketches could be when Chevy was on the show, they have lost a bit of their edge as time gone by, these have lost a little bit of their bite.
- A couple of technical issues here as Chevy looks in the wrong camera for almost a minute.
- I did like Chevy referring to his wife Betty (Curtin) as Ron Nessen, his outlining of why the canal is important with the assistance of a map, and some of his typical stumblebum hijinx. And of course, he takes the fall.
***

MONTAGE

- Just wanted to point out that they used the same opening montage from late-season 1 and season 2 from when Chevy was a castmember.

2. Monologue (4:25)

Chevy is elated to be back on the SNL stage and talks about the thing he misses most of all: the cheap applause one can get from a live audience.

- Chevy seems a bit more at ease here, but still seems a little more off than usual.
- I did like the idea of the monologue though with Chevy getting a cheap pop by referring to different sections of New York, pointing out how much he likes the show, and his attempts to get the band to stop playing.
- “You know what I really love about your applause.. is its spontaneity.”
- Again, another average segment but it had potential to be much better.
***

3. Moth Masher (1:37)

A spokesman (Aykroyd) demonstrates his new product and how it can be used to crush moths into an easier, more manageable size.

- Another one of Aykroyd’s crazy commercial pitchman ideas; this is one that had to be written (or at least co-written) by him.
****

4. Post-Coital Discussion (5:51)

After having a one-night stand, a man (Chase) and woman (Radner) discuss what went right and wrong. Through their discussion, it is revealed that the two had other things on their minds and the guy may not have been completely honest about who he is.

- This is a very well-written Miller piece with Chevy and Gilda both giving very subtle, relaxed performances.
- I especially liked when Chevy asked her if she had an orgasm and Gilda said that she stores them up and feels them all at once, “usually on the first day of Purim.”
- The discussion regarding the names they each screamed out during sex was also very funny, especially when Chevy is questioned for saying his own name and reasons that it’s because he’s used to spending so many nights by himself.
**** 1/2

5. Billy Joel sings “Only the Good Die Young” (3:32)

- Chevy mentions before the song that Billy missed his high school reunion to be the musical guest; this is true.
- This is an absolutely fantastic performance of a classic Billy Joel tune. It almost sounds like the album version; it’s crystal-clear and the instrumentals never overpower the vocals.

6. King (4:01)

John F. Kennedy (Aykroyd) and Bobby (Murray) attempt to bug Martin Luther King Jr. (Morris), so they can track everything he says.

- Odd placement of this sketch, but it’s understandable as Lorne had to rearrange the show a bit to avoid another Chevy/Murray scuffle.
- The performances were good here, but the sketch never really came together as a whole though.
- I liked the opening disclaimer where it said “some half-truths and lies have been invented to make it entertaining.”
- The reference to Billy Joel’s previous performance was amusing and clever.
** 1/2

7. UPDATE TEASER w/Jane Curtin (:08)

- Leon Spinx wins the Heavyweight Title.

8. WEEKEND UPDATE w/ Chevy Chase, Dan Aykroyd, & Jane Curtin (14:31)
Guests: Laraine Newman, Ray Floyd (Al Franken), John Belushi, Emily Litella (Radner), & Garrett Morris

Best Jokes: Pussywhip; Rhythm & Blues contraception; Billy Carter; Bert Lance

- Chevy joins in as an anchor a few minutes in by calling Aykroyd during the segment and convincing him that his mother is ill. Before he sits down, Jane gets a great look on her face like she’s taking over before our host makes his appearance.
- Laraine interviews a coal miner named Ray Floyd (Franken), who tries to comment on the situation but can’t stop hacking and coughing after working the mines for nearly 20 years. Filler.
- Chevy attempts to lure Jane away from the desk as well, but she catches Chevy on the other phone and calls him Sparky in an amusing moment.
- John Belushi stops by to give his thoughts on the Ali/Spinx championship fight and of course, it develops into an off-topic rant. This time, John talks about a time he got into a fight after his roommate was beaten up. He then attempts to see if Jane can defend herself and after beating her down with boxing gloves, he tells Chevy “it’s all yours.” Funny segment.
- The last guest to show up is Emily Litella (Radner), who complains about how she hasn’t been invited back onto Update very much now that “Ms. Clayton” is the anchorperson. Jane starts to walk away and freaks out at Emily and Chevy (specifically, she chastises Mr. Chase for mugging) and they both respond in kind.
- And to end Update, we get a real callback to the first season with Garrett Morris repeating the top story for the Hard of Hearing. His line flub was amusing too.
- Overall, while it wasn’t full of great jokes, the commentaries were mostly funny and the whole dynamic with Chevy trying to take over his old show again was great.
*** 1/2

9. Baggage Inspection (5:25)

A dimwitted baggage inspector (Chase) is grilled by his superior (Aykroyd), but fails to see the obvious drug smuggling being committed by a couple (Belushi & Newman).

- This is a classic; one of my absolute favourites, in fact.
- Even though it was only a quick scene from Garrett, he was hilarious slipping off to the bathroom and casually putting a joint in his mouth, saying that he had to go to the bathroom.
- Chevy being so oblivious to the cocaine in the couple’s suitcase was very funny as were John and Laraine’s reactions.
- Great visual gag with Laraine’s boob “leaking” as the cocaine just pours out and Belushi tries to stop it without being too obvious.
- Bill Murray pops by for a hilarious appearance at the end of the sketch but has barely any interaction with the host.
*****

10. GARY WEIS FILM: Bad Day Soundtrack (2:32)

A woman (Newman) has one of the worst days of her life, but spends most of it trying to find out where the singer (Valri Bromfield) is that is song-narrating it all.

- This seems like something that would be in a digital short today and the idea reminded me of “Harpoon Man.”
- Newman was good enough as the frustrated lead, but the singing got annoying towards the end. And why was it stand-up comedienne Valri Bromfield instead of a castmember or something?
* 1/2

11. Sermonette (3:27)

Reverend Archbishop Maharishi O’Mulliganstein D.D.S. (Chase) of the Church of Confusion sermonizes some scripture that makes absolutely no sense.

- This sounds like it would be stupid, but it actually was kind of amusing for Chevy’s performance as the nonsensical preacher even if it did go on a little long for a one-note segment like this.
***

12. World War II GI Quiz (4:04)

A pair of obvious German spies (Aykroyd & Murray) attempt to make their way past enemy lines, but are stopped and quizzed by an American sergeant (Belushi) to find out if they are truly part of the American military or the German side. Soon after, he begins questioning his own men (Chase & Morris) before doubting his own allegiances.

- Dan and Billy were very funny as the obvious spies with Billy counting to himself in German and Aykroyd declaring, “you can’t be too careful mit dose krauts!”
- Chevy didn’t do a whole lot in this sketch, but his impression was funny.
- This sketch shared a very similar structure to the Baggage Inspection bit, but it was still pretty funny just for the performances alone.
*** 1/2

13. Billy Joel sings “Just The Way You Are” (4:11)

- Another fantastic Billy Joel tune; the audience response upon hearing this song just tells you how good it is.

14. No Funny Ending (5:01)

A Victorian scene between Jane, Laraine, and Gilda is interrupted by Chevy, as he declares that they’ve run out of time for his final segment and that there’s no ending that is fit for the sketch. Several endings are then attempted (Twilight Zone-style) which get increasingly more ridiculous from Truman Capote (Belushi) without pants on to the Land Shark (Chase) devouring another victim.

- Another classic and one of my favourite sketches of the early years.
- The beginning with the three girls was funny in an “it’s obvious that this won’t be the focus of the sketch” kind of way.
- There’s lots of things to love here from Aykroyd’s Rod Serling to Belushi as Truman Capote getting interrupted by a smarmy director (Murray) right to the end where everyone suffers heart attacks but get up in time to answer the door for the Land Shark (Chase).
- Garrett’s appearance at the end was hilarious too as he comes in with his Archbishop outfit and then shuffles on outta there when he realizes that the scene has ended and he has missed his cue.
**** 1/2

15. Goodnights

- Bill Murray noticeably walks in a bit late and Belushi jokingly spars with him as the credits start to roll in a little nod to the fight that took place before the show.

OVERALL: Some people maintain that this is one of the few low points of Season 3 and while I agree to the extent that it’s not in the cream of the crop of the season, it’s certainly not a bad episode. Despite a number of average sketches throughout and a couple of misfires (the Weis film, King), this was still a really solid show with a very capable host, who was clearly shaky at the top of the show and settled down just in time for the first real sketch of the night. The cast also did a wonderful job as usual (it’s getting kind of redundant to say that) and even though Bill Murray was kept away from Chase for most of the night, he still turned in a few funny performances and showed his professionalism. All in all, a good episode with two bonafide excellent sketches and a number of average pieces.

BREAKDOWN:

HOST: CHEVY CHASE – 8 segments (A Former President Speaks To The Nation; Monologue; Post-Coital Discussion; Weekend Update; Baggage Inspection; Sermonette; World War II GI Quiz; No Funny Ending)

CAST:

DAN AYKROYD – 6 segments (Moth Masher; King; Weekend Update; Baggage Inspection; World War II GI Quiz; No Funny Ending)
JOHN BELUSHI – 4 segments (Weekend Update; Baggage Inspection; World War II GI Quiz; No Funny Ending)
JANE CURTIN – 3 segments (A Former President Speaks To The Nation; Weekend Update; No Funny Ending)
GARRETT MORRIS – 5 segments (King; Weekend Update; Baggage Inspection; World War II GI Quiz; No Funny Ending)
BILL MURRAY – 4 segments (King; Baggage Inspection; World War II GI Quiz; No Funny Ending)
LARAINE NEWMAN – 5 segments (Moth Masher; Weekend Update; Baggage Inspection; Bad Day Soundtrack; No Funny Ending)
GILDA RADNER – 3 segments (Post-Coital Discussion; Weekend Update; No Funny Ending)

FEATURED PLAYERS:

TOM DAVIS – none
AL FRANKEN – 1 segment (Weekend Update)

EPISODE MVP: John Belushi